I don’t know about you guys, but I’m pretty fucking STOKED Amanda Bynes is back in LA.
The worst thing she did here was just drive around aimlessly and get tickets (the official LA pastime).
In New York there was the broken bong vase, the arrest, the Drake tweets, her vagina getting slapped (not in that order), and a cancer charity’s worth of ratchet-ass wigs.
So we’re happy to have her back…and not a moment too soon:
According to the cab driver … Amanda was trying to get into an old folks home in Thousand Oaks — outside L.A. — when management at the place turned her away because they felt she was drunk and accused her of trespassing.
However, the retirement community was nice enough to call a taxi for Amanda — but when she got into the cab she said … “Get me the f**k out of here … I don’t have any money.” Naturally, the driver kicked her out at that point.
Honestly, how can you tell the difference between an old folks home and a home that belongs to old folks in Thousand Oaks? She was probably just trying to visit her parents.
Then shit got real when the MAN had to get his nightstick all up in that moistness:
Law enforcement sources tell us, the fire department responded to the home in Thousand Oaks, CA around 9pm — near where Amanda was just accused of trespassing — after someone noticed the small blaze in the driveway. The sheriff’s department was subsequently called when Amanda was found standing near the campfire.
This must have confused the hell out of the geezers. They probably thought she was a witch.
When sheriff’s deputies arrived, they questioned Amanda about what she was doing, and why she was doing it — and based on her answers, they determined she needed to be hospitalized on a 5150 hold. Translation: her answers were really wacky.
How many more ex-child stars are we going to lock away?
In all honesty…it’s a real tragedy. We lost another hot piece of ass to the crazies.
You know what? I’m a charitable guy.
I dropped a dime once and didn’t pick it up.
I told my friend’s ex she was “not ugly”.
I’m going to start a “Save the Still-Barely-Bangable 90s Stars” charity.
Lindsay Lohan will be there. As will Britney Spears.
Miley Cyrus will not. (Not arrested yet, not in the 90s, not worth saving)
Because we can’t keep letting this shit happen:
then…
now…
