I’m no expert on foreign policy. I’ve been to Canada and Mexico and when they asked “business or pleasure” I never said business for 2 reasons: I was smuggling Beanie Babies out of Canada If I said I was going to Cabo for business they’d laugh and then detain me Speaking of laughs, I’m not…

I’d like to think I’m a relatively low-maintenance individual. I’m self-sufficient and my diaper only needs to be changed once per day. Which is why I was stunned to find out that I have a really low Uber rating–and I’m not an Uber driver. How is that possible? (you say) Cuz Uber drivers rate passengers…

Pokemon taught us more than we could ever possibly comprehend about real life. look honey, if you’re just gonna lay there and splash around, i’m not gonna wait for you to evolve It taught us we have to eventually grow up and leave home, using the skills given to us and friends along the way.…

My grandma is 92. Don’t ask her either, she’ll tell you. She’s a petite, no-nonsense Italian woman. After marrying my grandfather, an Armenian, she had no way of communicating with her mother-in-law, who was from “Ze Old Count-ree™” and spoke little English. So, my grandmother learned the Armenian language, how to cook Armenian food, and volunteered…

My grandma is 92. Don’t ask her either, she’ll tell you. She’s a petite, no-nonsense Italian woman. After marrying my grandfather, an Armenian, she had no way of communicating with her mother-in-law, who was from “Ze Old Count-ree™” and spoke little English. So, my grandmother learned the Armenian language, how to cook Armenian food, and volunteered…

With all the news this week about Iraq falling into civil war due to Obama withdrawing troops, thousands of illegal alien children crowding our southern border due to Obama promising amnesty, and the IRS “accidentally” destroying hard drives of emails showing they targeted political opponents at the Obama administration’s behest, one story has gotten completely…

For those of you who don’t know what the Paleo diet is (obviously you don’t have any friends who have no friends), it’s designed around you cutting out anything and everything that cavemen didn’t eat (because cavemen are renowned for their dietary prowess as well as their long lifespans). I’ve written about it before (why…

Maya Angelou passed away this morning at the age of 86. Yes, she’s that kindly black lady whose poems you probably read in elementary school, then again in middle school, and just as a fun refresher, in high school. And in case you didn’t get enough Maya Angelou—her poems and stories frequently appeared on standardized…

Maya Angelou passed away this morning at the age of 86. Yes, she’s that kindly black lady whose poems you probably read in elementary school, then again in middle school, and just as a fun refresher, in high school. And in case you didn’t get enough Maya Angelou—her poems and stories frequently appeared on standardized…

Racism is ugly, but so is Donald Sterling. trust no bitch Once again, we all have to pretend to care about someone saying something racist. Was anyone discriminated against? Hurt? Ejected from a lunch counter? Hit with a water cannon? Fired from a job? (besides Donald word-that-rhymes-with-Duck?) Nope. But now that we’ve confirmed that the missing plane…