Since the stock market is tanking, might as well invest in Twinkies.
Apparently, compared to the normal “$4.29 for a box of ten Twinkies, one eBay seller sold a box for $59.99.”
Luckily, the company may be bought and someone else will make these little cakes of awesome again, unions and poor managers be damned.
I think I was 12 when I asked my mom if I could eat a Twinkie after watching a commercial for one.
We never were really a Twinkie household, so when we went to the supermarket and I excitedly ran to the Hostess stand, scooping up a box of the yellow heavencakes, she looked, well, perplexed.
“They’re not going to be as good as you think they are. They’re just…Twinkies,” she said.
However, she agreed to buying them, and as soon as I got home I ripped the box open, and the plastic, and devoured one like a mad diabetic.
And it tasted amazing. Processed? Yes. But also amazing. Nothing quite like it.
I was in college, it was one of the first football games of the season, and we had a long bus trip home.
It was before halftime (I think, I honestly remember like 25 seconds of this game) when I jonesed for some food. And there I saw it: deep-friend Twinkies.
So of course I got one. And it was covered in chocolate and whipped cream and tasted like heaven and I moaned like a wildebeest as I devoured it in front of terrified onlookers, smearing whipped cream and chocolate sauce all over my face like a mad diabetic.
I think I’ve probably eaten, like 4 Twinkies my whole life. They’re amazing, but they’re not an everyday food.
To paraphrase Jeremy Clarkson talking about a Lamborghini, I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again here. I don’t really want a Twinkie. But I don’t want to live in a world where it doesn’t exist.
