If yesterday was Björk’s Vulnicura, today is Björk’s Utopia.
Long story short, I’m…………
……..happy.
I’m not used to this feeling.
Have you ever been so used to things going wrong that you get wildly uncomfortable when they go right? Like so right, in ways you couldn’t have imagined?
I could start an examination of things I’ve done correctly but that buttressed to yesterday’s piece would leave us, where exactly? I’d rather embrace the things *going* right.
People say to practice gratitude, which is just so strange to me. When your identity is forged by your ability to put out fires, you become used to everything going wrong. Things fall apart, you lose money, loved ones, time. Feeling grateful seems depressing, like taking inventory of wine bottles that haven’t broken after the shelving collapsed in the earthquake.
I’m just entering this moment where I’m telling myself that it’s okay to be happy. That I shouldn’t be guilty for being so, or anxious that it’s all going to fall apart.
I could stand in the middle of the stream and say I want to live in this moment permanently, but the stream is ceaseless and I’d be cheating myself out of wonderful things to come.
Wonderful things could come. And I could be a part of them.
What a novel idea.
